Mom Friend: I just bought nutcrumbs online.
Me: Did you need some retail therapy?
Mom Friend: This is what almost 40 retail therapy looks like.
Me: I don’t even know what you bought.
Mom Friend: You know, instead of breadcrumbs, nutcrumbs. They sell it online.
Me: You can come over to my house and get all the nutcrumbs out of my couch. This is dismal retail therapy at best. I’m embarrassed by your purchase. Or maybe just by the name of your purchase. No definitely by the people taking advantage of you by selling you something you already have.
Mom Friend: Shut up, it’s healthy.
Me: Oh Yeah? You been pounding down the breadcrumbs lately? Making those homemade meatballs eveynight?
Mom Friend: I will now. And you can’t have any.
Me: Ok, enjoy those stuffed mushrooms you have to prepare now.
Mom Friend: I will. I’m going to enjoy them so much more knowing they are full of nutcrumbs.